Soul gas-station(No.28)

作者：admin来源：未知时间： 2019-08-24 人气：

Soulgas-station(psychiatric consulting)

(No.28)

Manylittlesmakeamickle!

To make the communication easier

--having respect

In our daily life, while communicating, there are always situations like “you can’t understand me, I don’t want to talk anymore.” It seems that there is always a gap between two speakers. How would that happen? The reasons might vary, but respecting each other is always one of the basic rules to make the communication easier. Here is a case to explore.

` Mom: You look tired today, what’s the matter？

Son: It’s always about study. it’stoo hard to improve my grades. Recently I’m too stressful and can’t sleep well.

Well, it’s senior year, it’s normal to have some pressures.

Emm, I’ve never been a good learner. Now I’m so bored with study and so sleepy in school. That’s so annoying.

I’m going to criticizing you. The College Entrance Examination is very important! With such a poor attitude, no wonder you had such bad grades!

I know CEE is important too! But there is a considerable gap betweenmy classmatesand me . I can’tcatch them.

But You have to! If you end up with failure in CEE, what else can you do?

I think maybe I don’t necessarily have to enter a college. It will be more useful to develop a skill. Nowadays skilled workers are in high demand.

what areyou talking about! What can you do Without a college diploma,who would hire you after graduation? Listen to me, entering a college is the only way to success.

But I just don’t think I can. What should I do?

I think you haven’t made enough effortsand you haven’t found the proper method. I was pretty good when I was your age. I would teach you.

That would be nice, but…

There’s no excuse. Listen, study hard and make more efforts,nothing is difficult.

Fine.

Firstof all, during this conversation, the mom didn’t consider the feelings of the child. When son said that “I’ve never been a good learner. Now I’m so boredwithstudy and so sleepy in school. That’s so annoying.”, her first respond was criticizing. The boy who is having so much pressure in study would feel disgustedanddepressed. Meanwhile mom didn’t consider over child’s feeling for a bit, keep saying “If you end up failure in CEE, what else can you do?” “I think you haven’t made enoughyou haven’t found the proper method.”

Secondly, the mom alwayssermonthe child. Not only has she impose her own value “entering the college is the only path”, but also giving the argument “Without a college diploma who would hire you after your gratulation?” to prove her opinion. How convincing the argument could be to the child who is working hard but still get poor grades? The helpless child wasn’t here to listen the value of knowledge which he had already understood. Everyone has their own value and path to pursue, and there’s no rightor wrong among them. If you can’t agree, at least you should show your respect.

Lastly, the mom had no respect to child’s right to express. She interrupted the child by “There’s no excuse. Listen, study hard and make more efforts, nothing is difficult.” In daily life, no matter how close you are, you should never interrupt someone.That’s very impolite. A autophilia doesn’t allow others to express their thoughts, they always insist they are right, and every different statement is wrong and need to be corrected. However, the colorful world is made up ofdifferent voices and views.

To communicateeaser, having respects is the first step. As the German philosopher Kant said: “I respect any independentsoul.AlthoughIdon’taprroveofsome ,Icanunderstandthemas much aspossible.”

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